On hearing of the brown's lane closure

this poem what I wrote,

the day the story broke,

I walked up to Allesley and left it in bars,

placed it under the wipers of the right sort of cars
I mailed it to the telegraph, in vain hope of exposure
and so, here in its origional form,



On hearing of the Brown's Lane Closure.

I've never wanted to own a car.
They're ugly, they're lethal, and they smell.
I never even bothered to learn,
You can't drink AND drive as well.

See if I had my way then all cars today
Would be forced to display
Warnings, like packets of cigarettes do.
"Most road accicedents involve vehicules", or
"Crashing while pregnant can damage your baby"
Maybe "Petrol fumes cause cancer and asthma and climate change to.

And expensive cars, they're the worst of the bunch,
Driven by sad men, who have bought them from runts
But there's one ace in the race which is rarely disgraced,
By a child through the windscreen of a corpse in the boot
Not a penis extension, but a Goddess substitute

Yes, solid as a spear, and so close to the ground
Purrs like a kitten, If it makes a sound,
And its not BMW or Mercedes Benz,
Its two fingers up at our smug German friends

And so have I dreamed, should I ever need a car,
to have earned (and learned) enough to drive a Cov-built Jaguar
But to sponsor our stadium, and then leave our town
And then think we'll just take this **** lying down
I mean its bad enough having a "nationwide" team,
Now our grounds huge new advert represents low self-esteem

So When these GITS come to close down your plant,
Jut out your jaws, and tell them they can't.
Keep ordering materials on ninety day terms,
tell your accountants to sweet talk your firms.

And when they come to take the machinery away
Let the hard-men of Coventry jump intothe fray.
Our employees may need to go a week without pay,
But everyone knows someone who works at Brown's Lane
We have to support them, show thios can't happen again.
We lost Standard Triumph, Massey, Marconi too,
But we can keep the Jag, Coventry has too.

So don't stop making Jaguars, whatever we do,
The worlds got enough cars, but Jaguars too few.
But should the worst happen, and they get their way,
Try to be brave on that disastrous day
As it won't be for long; Ford won't stand their ground,
Not when all their other plants close down